Twilight Warriors (Morgan Style :D)

(Edward and Bella are walking through the Clan Cat’s forest, talking)
Edward: I told you, we have to get married first. Than I’ll bite you!
Bella: *In an evil voice* Where will you bite me?
Edward: Excuse me…?!
(They are interrupted as various Clan cats walk by.)
Edward and Bella: WTF?!
Jaypaw: I told you, my stick is straight. He… she’s never done anything wrong!!
Hollypaw: Yeah, sure, and it’s not like I didn’t see you last night-
Lionpaw: Look who’s talking, you’re not exactly innocent yourself…
Hollypaw: Look, Willowpaw and I only did it a couple of times so-
Willowpaw: Correction! More than ‘just a couple of times’. I remember when-
Hollypaw: That’s not the point.
Leafpool: Forget that, look- It’s a sexy twoleg that sparkles!
Edward: Vampire. I’m a Vampire!
Crowfeather: So now I’m not good enough?! You choose a… sparkly Twoleg Vampire over ME? We even had those freaks... er kits… together!
Leafpool: And look how they turned out!
Brambleclaw: You mean I have no kits? But I did it so many times-
Squirrelflight: Shh!! We were supposed to be mad at each other, remember?
Brambleclaw: *wails* But-
Edward: Um, who, no what, are you?
Bella: Isn’t that kinda obvious, Edward? *mutters* Sometimes I wonder why I thought he was so smart…
Jaypaw: We’re a bunch of talking cats, what do you think?
Hollypaw: Gay talking cats…
Leafpool: *Continues previous argument* Oh, come on Crowfeather. You expect me not to cheat, when you’ve done it with what? Two or three other cats?
Crowfeather: *lamely* Well, that was different. I um…
Edward: Oh my, images…
Bella: OOOO, what images?!
Hollypaw: *hotly* And you can’t attack me, Lionpaw, because we all know you go into that dark forest alone with Tigerstar every night!
Lionpaw: Shut up. Brambleclaw set the example! And Hawkfrost is there to supervise…
Leafpool: Anyway: *leaps on Edward* Here I come!
Squirrelflight: Leafpool…!
Then-
I’m coming too! *follows sister*
Edward: Oh my. No, no, don’t touch- Dang it…
Jaypaw: Does that mean I can go get my stick?
Hollypaw: …!
Lionpaw: Sure, why not. *Then* Oh Tigerstar, where are you?
Tigerstar: Oh, Lionpaw, it’s so good to see you again, honey!
Hawkfrost: Let’s not get too excited, we don’t want to hurt each other!
Lionpaw: Shh, Tigerkinz, we don’t want Brambleclaw to know I am his mother-in-law!
Brambleclaw: *sucks paw* So much betrayal!
Edward: Oh, shut up. Bella, help me get this tabby off of my butt.
Bella: Ok, but what about the ginger one?
Hollypaw: *snickers* Awkward…
Bella: No, not really. *Evil smile; grabs Squirrelflight*
Edward: These cats *ouch* certainly know *wince* their stuff *gasp*.
Leafpool: Yes…yes…yes!
Heatherpaw: *walks up* Hi everyone!
Jaypaw: Join the party!
Breezepaw: *following Heatherpaw* um…..
Heatherpaw: Where’s Lionpaw?
Jaypaw: Oh yeah, I forgot, you two used to sneak off to the caves at night and-
Heatherpaw: Well, it’s not as bad as, well, you know…. *looks awkwardly at Jaypaw’s stick*
Breezepaw: What about the time those kits wandered off alone? There were three of them…
Edward: Images! Ohmygod! Images! Ew!
(Brackenfur walks by; Hollypaw’s mentor)
Brackenfur: Hollypaw, I thought you were a virgin!!
Lionpaw: Notice the term “were”.
Hollypaw: *looking drunk* I are…
Brackenfur: Sure…
Hollypaw: Can guys be virgins too?
Edward: Oh my…

The End…!